I have insomnia. Well, maybe it’s not really insomnia, because it’s not like I can’t sleep (I can), and more like I don’t want to sleep. Or actually, I don’t want to fall asleep.
It’s not like I think I won’t wake up in the morning or anything, or that I have too many worries rolling around in my head (although as a mother that does tend to happen to me sometimes). No, it’s just – I dunno. I want to fall asleep doing something. Watching TV. Reading a book. Listening to my iPod. But something. Not just putting my head down on the pillow and closing my eyes.
Weird.
It’s possible that it’s a symptom of depression, a mental illness that I have a bit of a history with. But apart from the falling asleep thing, I don’t have any other symptoms of the disease.
Right now, it’s 2:22 a.m. where I am. And I have not yet slept. Why? Because I prefer to sit up writing until my eyelids droop and my head nods.
Help?
Filed under: introspection | Tagged: depression, insomnia
Great new blog! Love it!
My husband has the same sleep problem. He’ll actually take a quick nap after work so he has the energy to stay up well into the night. I have the opposite problem – I’m often up at 5:00 AM, eager to start the day and have a little time all to myself.
Thanks Lori, I love your blog too; as you can tell, since it’s in my fledgling blogroll ;)
Hmmm…you and your DH seem the opposite of me and mine. He is up at 5:30 or so every day of the week, and sometimes I’ve just come to bed a few hours before.
Anyway, glad to know I’m not alone in this.
I’m not sure because I suffer from the too-many-things-rolling-around-in-my-head insomnia. Maybe I’ll try listening to my iPod and see if that helps. Thanks for the tip ;)
Me too. It’s not insomnia though — it’s depression. I can’t think about everything involved with getting ready for bed.
Logically it doesn’t seem that difficult, but it’s overwhelming nonetheless.
I fall asleep on the couch almost every night and then wake up and move to my bed around 3 am – 5 am.
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